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Wisdom, benevolence, and fortitude are the universal virtue of all.

Then I shall assemble the three here.

Believe it or not, bars are the best place out there to hold a discussion about almost everything: Science, Religion, Humanity, Economy, you name it. Just make sure your friends are too smashed to actually comprehend your rambling about “Theory of Everything” you heard secondhand on the internet this afternoon, and you’ll be the smartest guy alive(just for that fleeting moment, though) for them. Thus, I sneaked some of my own agenda in our usual weekend hangout last time.

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Your studying for finals ain’t got nearly a thing with my booze-gulping party preparations.

So, like usual my friends ordered a pitcher of the cheapest beer the can serve without mixing it with piss out of hatred for their loyal customers who always pay only after they hire street thugs as debt collectors. We’re taking it slow.

TheWaiter

In our defense, it’s because their waiters sometimes feel a bit ‘plastic’.

When the orders came around, one of my friend upon realizing that I ordered Oolong tea instead of the same cheap-dirt piss-solution they called beer, sneered at me, 「Oh, so what are we gonna discuss tonight, Mr. Einstein?」 My ruse was spotted even before I did anything, were they didn’t get drunk enough last time when I do this? (last time it was when the science community announce the “God Particle”, there was a live feed on the press conference if memory serves right) ::W-what are you talking about? Nothing special, really.:: I said bashfully while maiden-slapping their skulls one by one with the waiter’s tray that for whatever reason was within my reach, thus effectively rendered them as smashed as unicorn piñata spewing diabetes-coated teeth-cavity inducer. Not actually the original plan, but now they’re ready for the Symposium.

Part I

Symposium of Drunken men on Zisi of “Doctrine of the Mean”

Remorseless Sociopath Instigator (Henceforth Me)

So, today I assemble you all here is but for one thing, that is to discuss about the implication brought upon by Science and Religion throughout history of mankind.

Plot-conveniently Drunk A (Henceforth A-kun)

………………………………………………………………………… (Out cold)

Plot-conveniently Drunk B (Henceforth B-kun)

………………………………………………………………………… (Out cold)

Me

What the…

To be continued…!?

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